I was stressed. And I should’ve not been because it was the Sabbath.
Last night, I was wide awake up until 02:30 am because, you know, hormones. Something I could not pin point was bothering me and I was overthinking everything. I was not in a good mood and was so sulky when he called me over the phone.
He was asking what’s with my mood and bakit ako nagtataray. I couldn’t tell him the reason because I myself do not understand. Yes, hormones are difficult to understand.
Long night. Short sleep. Bad morning.
My mind-set for this Sabbath was that I am going to play the piano, as usual, and that’s all. No any other major part in the church service. BUT…
I was asked to be the Divine Worship speaker, impromptu, because the pastor who was supposed to visit us got sick and said he will not be able to come. Ugh. I hate impromptus but what any other choice do I have? People in our local church are very good listeners and they are not really used to speaking in front. That is why when they know I am home, they always expect something from me.
I was feeling light-headed but still managed to rush everything. From fixing my self, to putting my things together, to preparing the message and to making sure everything will work out just fine.
I was so stressed. But it was the Sabbath and I’m trying my very best to control everything.
I texted him about my situation before I finally put off my phone and focused on the things that needs to get done. I actually don’t feel I have the right to rant to him about my current situation given the fact that I was so irritable last night to the point I actually raised my voice at him. Nevertheless, he is the only person I know who could understand me so I still did.
And you know what? I was humiliated with his response. And the other succeeding messages.
The Most Patient, Most Understanding and Most Supportive Boyfriend Award goes to him! After showing him my unexplainable temperaments, he never showed me any hint that he’s mad or angry or whatever. In fact, he still prayed for me like he always does.
I was rebuked how grumpy and ungrateful and full of complaints I am most of the time. But look over here, how calm and peaceful and prayerful my sweetheart is.
I know I’ll always have him. I’ll always have my prayer warrior.
Thank you for Daniel, my prayer warrior. Thank because when my life gets out of control, You always use him to calm me and to remind me that You are in control. Help me become a prayer warrior for him, too. Bless our relationship and teach us to pray more.